30 Nights Read online

  “You’re in for a treat.” He made his way over to the bed closest to me. “Want some help?”

  It wasn’t as though Eric hadn’t seen me naked before, so why I had this sudden onslaught of shyness was beyond me. Still, I wasn’t the kind of fool to say no to a handsome man offering to help me strip. I stepped up to the table and undid the sash of my robe. Before I had the chance to pull it open, Eric stepped behind me and ran the back of his hand along the side of my neck.

  His gentle caress lit my body on fire. My breath hitched and my nipples tightened as he reached around and pulled the robe down my shoulders. “You’re beautiful. Your skin is all flushed and you smell like flowers.”

  I moaned and tipped my head back until it was pressed to his chest. “They’ll be back soon.”

  “This will only take a minute.” The robe fell, getting caught between our bodies. Eric reached up and cupped my breasts and tweaked my nipples until they were hard peaks. “Do you know what I’m looking forward to the most?”

  When I spoke, it barely emerged as a whisper. “What?”

  “The shower after the massage.”

  Dead.

  I was dead. Or this was the best dream in the world.

  “We better get you on the table before they come back.” He pulled the sheets back and helped me get situated on my front. Before he pulled the sheet up to cover my body, he ran a finger down my spine. “My cock is so hard I’m going to punch a hole in the wood.”

  I laughed as I pressed my face into the weird open pillow. “They may charge you extra if you damage the table.”

  Eric didn’t take any time at all to get into place and before I knew it, the masseuses were back. If I thought the soak in the tub was good, the massage was stellar. She found knots in my neck that I hadn’t even realized were there. And when she put the hot stones on my back and then proceeded to coax away every ache hiding in my muscles, I knew I could die a happy woman.

  The added bonus was having my head be next to Eric’s. Every time his masseuse hit a knot, he’d hold his breath for a moment before letting it out. If I let out a soft moan of pleasure, I knew he heard and would sometimes let out a little sigh of his own. It was arousing and relaxing and by the time she was finished, I was coated in oily goodness.

  “We’re all finished. Take your time getting up. Please don’t rush. There’s a shower in the back for you to use, clean towels set aside for you both, and some organic fruits for you to eat. We also have a selection of naturally flavored waters for you to drink. Whenever you’re finished, feel free to dress. This room is yours for another half an hour.”

  I waited for them to leave before I let out a long moan. “I never want to leave.”

  “I think I might have fallen asleep if it weren’t for all of your moans.”

  Lifting my head, I looked at him. We were just far enough away that a kiss would be dangerous, but close enough that I could see how wide his pupils had grown in the dim light. I couldn’t see any of the rich brown that I’d grown fond of, but the intensity that I always associated with him was there in spades.

  I swallowed. “I think I’d like to have that shower now.”

  And then I got the one thing I’d wanted for ages.

  Eric laughed.

  15

  We started kissing the second our feet hit the floor. I wrapped my hands around his neck and let him hold me to his chest. This was different from our time at the hotel; there wasn’t any awkwardness, any second-guessing what we were about to do.

  It was just me and Eric, naked and willing in our escape from reality.

  I wanted to keep my eyes closed as he kissed me long and deep, but I equally wanted to see his face. The Eric I’d known for over a year always appeared in tight control of his emotions. He was the consummate professional, kind and intelligent. Passion wasn’t a descriptor I would have used for him before now. Even our previous nights didn’t seem to have this powder keg feel to them.

  He moved his mouth from mine and traveled down the side of my jaw to my throat. “You kept moaning and I was turned on so much.” He spoke between nips and kisses. “I wanted to push them away from you. I wanted to lick your pussy until you screamed.”

  “Fuck.” I pushed my hand into his hair, tugging on the strands. “Eric.”

  It was a comment on how lost to the moment I was when I didn’t react at all when he picked me up and swung me into his arms. Instead of speaking, I began my own assault on his ear, licking the shell and teasing his lobe with my teeth until he growled.

  “I need to turn the shower on.”

  I groaned in protest. The last thing I wanted was to break contact, to lose my hold on him in case this really was a dream and I would wake up at any moment.

  “I promise I’ll be quick.”

  He was a man of his word. It only took a few seconds for him to figure out how the controls worked and for the soft splatter of water to burst from the six showerheads. The stall itself was an open booth, tiled floor and walls that sloped perfectly toward the drain. There weren’t any walls closing the stall in; rather, it seemed to be an open concept area, easily accessible to anyone.

  The pressure from the water wasn’t going to remove any skin, but it was perfect for getting rid of the oils that had been used. Eric moved me into position under the water, letting it hit my back first. For a moment I thought we were going to jump right to the main action, but he was a patient man. Using a squirt of scented soap, he massaged my skin on my shoulders and neck. He washed my throat and cheeks, pausing to kiss the spots before lathering them. He turned me around and washed my back. His hands traveled down my body, and he dipped his fingers into the top of the crack of my ass. I groaned and instinctively bucked my hips back.

  “You like that?”

  “Yes.” My body was shaking from this contact, the persistent tenderness that he bestowed to every inch of my skin.

  Eric cupped both my ass cheeks in his hands and squeezed. “Not tonight, but if you want, I would love to fuck your ass. To tease you there. Maybe fuck you with that vibrator, using the remote so you wouldn’t know what I was going to do next.”

  Hallelujah, yes! “Condom?”

  He held a packet in my periphery. “I slipped it in my robe.”

  “So naughty, Professor.”

  He laughed and kissed the back of my neck. “How do you want to do this?”

  I didn’t hesitate. I moved to the wall to the side of one of the showerheads and braced my hands. We were close enough to the water to feel the spray, but not so much that we would drown. “Like this.”

  I felt his movements, rather than heard him put the condom on. Even then, he didn’t immediately push his way into me. Eric reached around and once again cupped my breasts with his hands. He teased one nipple while he moved his other hand down until it covered my pubic mound. I squeezed my eyes shut and willed him to touch me. The moment I felt his cock press against my pussy, his fingers threaded through my pubic hair and forked around my clit.

  “Oh God.” My head fell forward as I savored the sensation of being filled.

  He pushed all the way forward until he was filling me. I waited for him to move, even bucked my hips back against him to encourage him on, but he didn’t. Without warning, he moved his hand away from my clit and reached for the showerhead. “I have an idea.”

  With the first burst of water against my clit, I was scrambling to hold on to something. Eric took my hand and placed it on the safety handle so I wouldn’t slip. “Wouldn’t want to end up in the emergency room.”

  Yeah, that would be a fun thing to explain.

  “Hold this. Point it down on the top of your clit, not up.” We shifted and I gripped the showerhead as hard as I could and I held the handle. With both his hands free, Eric gripped my hips and began to fuck me.

  Our mutual gasps were swallowed by the water and ambient music playing in the room. We didn’t need to speak, to tease and beg each other for what we wanted. We said what we needed to
through our actions.

  The water was a continuous stream on my clit. Pleasure filled me, my pussy alive and sensitized in a way I’d never experienced before. I felt hard, swollen from the pleasure, engorged with desire and Eric’s cock.

  I knew there was no way I would be able to hold out long. Between the massage and Eric’s touch, my nerve endings were alive and sparking. My pussy squeezed around his cock every time he filled me, and the tightness drove my sensitivity up another notch. Eric’s arousal must have been as high. On every thrust he squeezed my hips harder, his fingertips digging into my skin. It didn’t hurt, if anything it was a turn-on.

  He was clearly as far gone as I was. Words slipped from him in soft gasps. I couldn’t even be certain he was aware of the mine and yes and fucks he muttered. With each syllable, my longing for him grew. We’d made no promises beyond this, beyond sex, but I knew I wouldn’t be satisfied until I won his heart.

  My orgasm didn’t give me much in the way of notice before it rolled through me. I cried out briefly before I clamped my mouth shut, biting my lower lip in the process. My muscles tensed and I lost my grip on the showerhead, sending it to fall limply from its hose. My other hand was engaged in a death grip with the handle. It and the strength of Eric’s hold on my hips were the only things keeping me from falling to my knees.

  Eric flexed his grip on me, but continued with the same steady, firm pace until my orgasm subsided. I turned my head, catching only the briefest glance of his face—contorted, red, handsome—before he pulled back and slammed into me. He didn’t make a sound as he came, but I felt every pulse of his body as he filled the condom with his come. With a final mighty thrust, his body stilled and he slowly bent forward and rested his head between my shoulder blades.

  “Jesus.” I barely heard him speak before he kissed my spine. “Are you okay?”

  I couldn’t help but laugh. “You’re hilarious. And crazy if you think I’d be anything other than amazing after this.”

  Eric slowly pulled out of me and peeled off the condom. The water washed us both clean and he carefully disposed of the condom in some paper towel and hid it in the garbage can. I couldn’t be certain, but I had a sneaking suspicion that we weren’t the first couple to take advantage of this shower. Something the spa most likely counted on.

  We were still well within our extra time, which wasn’t all that surprising given how horny we both had been. It was weird, but as we dried off and put our robes back on, my shyness started to creep back. Here I’d been having these amazing nights with Eric and I still felt as though we didn’t know each other. I pulled my hair out of the now disastrous bun and fixed it while trying to get a sense of where he was emotionally.

  Pleased? He looked pleased. Or maybe that was simply his after-sex face. He also looked a bit relieved. His honesty about using me and these cards as a means to sort out something started playing a bit of havoc with my head.

  “Where did you find this place? You don’t strike me as a spa guy.”

  Eric still hadn’t pulled on his robe, so I was able to see the muscles tighten in his back. “I’ve been here before. It’s been a few years ago though.”

  “You’ve done this?” Okay, I shouldn’t have been surprised by this particular revelation. I knew Eric had a past and, as Jasmine said, the man could have sex with anyone he wanted.

  But this had felt . . . I don’t know, special somehow. That this was our thing, an event from the cards that no one knew about. If he was rehashing something he’d done with a previous lover, that was more fucked up than I could handle.

  “Not exactly this, but yes. We’d been here before.”

  The warm fuzzies I’d been feeling vanished. “You and who?”

  Eric straightened and turned to face me. “Grace. Her name is Grace.”

  “Are you seeing her anymore?”

  “No.”

  “Is she the person you’re using these cards to get over?” The person you’re using me to get over?

  The muscle in his jaw twitched. “Yes.”

  “I see.”

  In a way, I couldn’t be mad at him. He’d never promised me love and roses when we started out, even if that’s where my mind had jumped to recently. It had always been about sex, about fun. Shit, he’d told me that I was being used. This shouldn’t hurt!

  It was knowing her name that killed me. Knowing that they’d been a couple—Grace and Eric—and for whatever reason they’d broken up and he wasn’t over her. Or it could be worse. “She’s not dead, is she?”

  “No. She’s . . . fine. Lives here in Toronto. She used to teach with me at U of T.”

  “She’s the reason you left there and came to our school. You were getting away from her?”

  He looked away. “I don’t want to discuss this.”

  “Right. I’m sorry.” I wasn’t sorry, not in the slightest. I was hurt and embarrassed for letting myself get emotionally attached to a man who was clearly unavailable.

  I’d taken a step out into the land of adventure just like Great Glenna had wanted.

  I didn’t like what I found.

  “We better get out of here and get dressed.” I smiled, hoping that he couldn’t tell how upset I was. “Do we go out the main door? I’d hate to walk into the tub room and catch some unsuspecting person naked.”

  “Glenna—”

  I held up my hand. “Seriously, it’s fine. You’ve been nothing but honest with me. And I’m still dopey from the massage and the great sex. Let’s just head out.”

  My mind was screaming for me to run, to get as far away from him as I could so I wouldn’t get hurt more. I didn’t. I slipped into my bamboo flip-flops, tucked my hands inside the deep pockets of the robe, and made my way to the main door. Eric was staring at me, but I couldn’t look back at him. The thought of seeing something there, on his face, hurt or confusion, was more than I could handle.

  I placed my hand on the doorknob and waited. “Ready? Wouldn’t want to give people a free shot.”

  “Ready.” His voice wavered.

  I ignored it.

  “Okay, I’m heading to my dressing room. I’ll meet you out front.”

  I got dressed slowly. My fingers shook as I pulled on my shirt and did up the buttons. My mind spun and I couldn’t get a single word out of my head.

  Why?

  Why did they break up? Why was Eric having such a hard time getting over her? Why did he want to use me? Why had I agreed to let myself be used?

  Why couldn’t I learn that adventures weren’t meant for someone like me?

  Eric was waiting for me in the lobby when I finally got out. He was smiling as he spoke to Tori, but the sparkle wasn’t there in his eyes.

  “Sorry I’m slow. I never want to leave this place.”

  Tori tittered out a little laugh. “We hear that a lot. I hope the two of you will come back again.”

  Yeah, no. “It’s going on my list of things I want to do. And I’m totally going to tell all my friends.”

  Eric remained quiet as we left. Unlike our arrival, he didn’t offer me his arm, nor would I have taken it if he had. We didn’t speak as we got into the car and pulled into the busy street. It was Friday night and the students and young professionals were already hitting the clubs and restaurants in the area. Eric stopped at a red light and a sea of young, happy people passed.

  I was one of them.

  I was only in my twenties, single, self-sustaining, and generally happy. Hitting the clubs, meeting new people, those were the adventures I should be having. A call to Jasmine and I could be out there dancing and drinking like there was no tomorrow.

  Sitting in a car feeling butt-hurt about the intentions of a man who’d proven to be more human and less fantasy wasn’t logical. I kept my gaze fixed on the last group to cross the street. “I’ve had fun this past month.”

  Eric didn’t say anything as he pulled the car forward when the light turned green.

  “You’ve opened my eyes up to a lot of things. Thes
e cards were a bit crazy. I’m sure that’s why Alyssa left them behind. There’s only so much a person can do with them before reality kicks in.”

  “I know what you’re going to say. Please don’t.” There was something in his voice—fear, hurt, longing—that I didn’t want to label.

  “It would be for the best.”

  “Give it the weekend. Think. I will too. We can talk Monday?”

  This was stupid. I didn’t need time to know that if we continued playing these little games things weren’t going to end well for either of us. “Fine.”

  “Thank you.” He reached over and gave my hand a squeeze.

  “No problem.” Only time would tell if that would be the case.

  Monday morning came and went much the same way that my previous week had, with my head buried deep in research. I wasn’t as frazzled as I could have been, but that was simply because I’d spent most of the weekend here.

  I’d realized quickly on Saturday morning that there was no chance I’d be able to stay in my apartment, alone with my thoughts. Jasmine was busy, and I didn’t want my bad mood to add grief to Mom and Dad’s healing process. The only other option I had was work.

  And that sucked on a level I couldn’t begin to describe.

  I was the oldest twenty-eight-year-old I knew.

  Saturday bled into Sunday, which somehow morphed into Monday afternoon. I’d been so head-down that I had barely acknowledged Jasmine all day. Even her projectile jelly beans weren’t going to distract me. I had my noise-canceling earbuds in and some electro swing music on replay to keep me focused on the task at hand.

  Not thinking about Eric.

  To this point, I’d only been moderately successful.

  One of the things that I couldn’t do anything about was my unfortunate need to visit the library. I’d been putting it off as long as I could, knowing that Eric had class in the afternoon so the chances of me running into him were slim. I could have taken the stairs by our office, but wanted to prove to both him and myself that I was fine. That I was stronger than my self-doubt. So rather than taking the easy way out, I picked up my books and ID and pulled my earbuds out.